My Bucket List

Yes It's been crossed out.
My entire list.

Instead I am replacing it with 
Psalm 45:10-11
Listen, daughter, and pay careful attention:
    Forget your people and your father’s house.
 Let the king be enthralled by your beauty;
    honor him, for he is your lord.

It's time to let go of my past. 

So I can focus on my future and give everything to my King.
Time to be about the Father's business.

My next post.

I would like to go to the Opera at the Met in New York.

I would like to taken a vacation - anywhere.

I would like to visit family in California - Texas - Indiana and North Carolina.

I would like to see my sons and daughter in laws and see, hold and love on my beautiful grandchildren.

That is about it.

I really don't have much of a list.

Life is what it is. 

I am where I am. 

I know I am where I am supposed to be.

I am content with it all - for the most part.

If only those gaping holes in my heart  

 Would heal up

 I would be completely content.

I realize I should be completely content now.

Honestly, though as hard as I try and no matter what I try

I can't forget - put out of my heart and mind - my precious ones. I truly believe, to grieve the loss of a loved one who is still alive can be greater than to grieve the loss of a loved one who has died and gone on to be with the Lord. This pain is truly the worst pain I have ever felt in my 53 years here on earth.

I also know that G-d is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

So I put my hope in G_d alone.  Knowing - that this is something that only G-d can take care of. 

Something that needs to happen in - not only in my heart - but also in the hearts of those who hold the pieces missing from my heart. I look forward to that day - be it here in this world or in the new world to come!